MIDWEEK FICTION: Chicken Social

    Chicken Social was a small yellow chick with good legs, a loud chirp, and a phone.  One day he crossed the road and hopped along the road to see if the worms were fatter I other people’s yard, and came to a high fence around an airport.      Since he had never seen anContinue reading “MIDWEEK FICTION: Chicken Social”

Did They Really…Yeah, They Did

     For reasons we needn’t go into, the above has never been one of my favorite gags.  But I believe it helps illustrate that our ancestors were not as shy about sex as we like to believe.  (As noted hereintofore, that’s how they got to be ancestors.)  This is a joke which makes absolutely noContinue reading “Did They Really…Yeah, They Did”

MIDWEEK FICTION: Terms and Condititions

     “Are you Emir the Inexhaustible?”      “You know the answer, sir.  You were in here just last week.  You brought in a wallet and I tried to turn you away because I can enchant only things I have never enchanted before, and wallets are always being brought to me.”      “I thought I hadContinue reading “MIDWEEK FICTION: Terms and Condititions”

All-American G-Rated Cussin’

     As I continue my hopeless quest to figure out why some writers a hundred years ago or thereabouts referred to a handgun as a “roscoe” (I keep waiting for Fatty Arbuckle to be the answer, but no one goes along with it) and my equally futile journey to find out what happened to theContinue reading “All-American G-Rated Cussin’”

CRUSHES OF YORE

     I am not sure we have ever discussed in this space the phenomenon of the pin-up joke, a classic of humor for decades.  Of course, you know what a pin-up is: THAT goes back for centuries (possibly millennia, depending on whether those cave paintings and ancient sculptures were offerings to a fertility goddess orContinue reading “CRUSHES OF YORE”

The King’s Leg Man

     “Sir Comvent!”      “Sire?”      “I need a new pair of boots.”      “I don’t suppose that means I will accompany Your Majesty to the cobbler’s shop.”      “Perhaps you forgot, sir knight, that you speak to a king who pulled his sword from a stone.”      “Perhaps Your Majesty forgets that Your MajestyContinue reading “The King’s Leg Man”

Having It Both Ways

     A few months gone, we discussed in this space the concept of the trade card, a Victorian sales device issued by stores who realized that if people started collecting these, they would come to the store to see if a new one was ready.  Getting someone into the store was half the battle, afterContinue reading “Having It Both Ways”

FICTION FRIDAY: Those Old Piano Roll Blues

     I need to get this off my chest.  You’ll understand why.      First off, despite all the rumors which have surrounded my discoveries in the pianowork of Wolfgang “Whiskey Pete” M’Cloud, I did NOT use some kind of computer magic on his recordings.  I lack the skill even to come up with some ofContinue reading “FICTION FRIDAY: Those Old Piano Roll Blues”

Covering Dishes

     It has been some time since we meandered through Memory Kitchen, largely because this is NOT a food blog.  But casseroles came up in an online chat, and this threw my mind back into the Iowa kitchen of my boy days.      And I must break your heart at the outset.  We never ateContinue reading “Covering Dishes”