“Ankle ankle ankle ankle ankle….”
“Sir? Sir?”
“I beg your pardon. I….my brain…I’m sorry. They call it post-traumatic…. What was the question?”
“I’m afraid I was being rude, sir, but I DO wish to know what your ANGLE is in applying for a job for which you are clearly overqualified.”
“I seek a position with moderate authority, so I can avoid the stresses of my previous post.”
“Yes, as personal assistant to Prince Charming, you seem to have had a great deal of opportunity for self-supervision. But here you would be expected to toe the line.”
“Toe toe toe toe toe toe….”
“Sir? Sir, please! Are there many words which trigger these seizures?”
“I’m sorry. Not many. You see, my major assignment at the end was to carry a glass, er, garment to be tried on the…person of various young ladies.”
“I understand you, sir. But how did this trigger your difficulties?”
“Do you know how many young single women lived in our realm? And you NEVER find what you’re looking for until you’ve tried…. Eighteen thousand fourteen. Eighteen thousand fourteen right…right….”
“Yes, sir. So when you carried this glass…garment into the homes of thousands of beautiful young….”
“Beautiful? Perhaps elsewhere. But eighteen thousand…. And I’d arrive in the middle of the afternoon—in summer, mind you—and they hadn’t…. It was grotesque! Just the dirty…nails I had to push into…. I told the Prince, “Let them know when we’re in town so they can at least take the garden hose and rinse off their….”
“And in spite of this, you continued right to the finish? I am impressed by your perseverance, sir. That is a very useful trait. I think you are very likely the sort of dedicated employee the Duke is looking for.”
“Reay? And I wouldn’t…be anywhere near the…the wardrobe?”
“No, sir. That is exalted sort of work is never entrusted to you footmen.”
“Foo…. Nooooooooo!”
“Oh dear. Hendrik, send in the next applicant. And see that that window is repaired.”
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