FICTION FRIDAY: Three Other Little Pigs

     Once upon a time there were three little pigs.  The first little pig liked broccoli, so she built a restaurant that served elegant broccoli dishes.  The second little pig loved eggs, so she built herself a bistro that served light fluffy egg dishes.  The third little pig had no imagination, so she built herselfContinue reading “FICTION FRIDAY: Three Other Little Pigs”

Got a Feelin’ You’re Foolin’

     And so we come to April Fool’s Day.  This is a holiday with a rich tradition of postcard-sending, but not so much in this country.  As we have treated elsewhere hereintoforehitherto about the cheerful French tradition of fish postcards which combine April Fool’s Day with the old style New Year celebrations.  So today weContinue reading “Got a Feelin’ You’re Foolin’”

Suds and Songs

     The association of wine, women, and song is an ancient one, and carries cultural baggage too multitudinous to unpack in a single blog (or year of blogs).  The tradition in comedy of singing among men who have lubricated their windpipes sufficiently to break down discretion is also a bit much to consider in oneContinue reading “Suds and Songs”

MIDWEEK FICTION: Chicken Social

    Chicken Social was a small yellow chick with good legs, a loud chirp, and a phone.  One day he crossed the road and hopped along the road to see if the worms were fatter I other people’s yard, and came to a high fence around an airport.      Since he had never seen anContinue reading “MIDWEEK FICTION: Chicken Social”

Did They Really…Yeah, They Did

     For reasons we needn’t go into, the above has never been one of my favorite gags.  But I believe it helps illustrate that our ancestors were not as shy about sex as we like to believe.  (As noted hereintofore, that’s how they got to be ancestors.)  This is a joke which makes absolutely noContinue reading “Did They Really…Yeah, They Did”

MIDWEEK FICTION: Terms and Condititions

     “Are you Emir the Inexhaustible?”      “You know the answer, sir.  You were in here just last week.  You brought in a wallet and I tried to turn you away because I can enchant only things I have never enchanted before, and wallets are always being brought to me.”      “I thought I hadContinue reading “MIDWEEK FICTION: Terms and Condititions”

All-American G-Rated Cussin’

     As I continue my hopeless quest to figure out why some writers a hundred years ago or thereabouts referred to a handgun as a “roscoe” (I keep waiting for Fatty Arbuckle to be the answer, but no one goes along with it) and my equally futile journey to find out what happened to theContinue reading “All-American G-Rated Cussin’”

CRUSHES OF YORE

     I am not sure we have ever discussed in this space the phenomenon of the pin-up joke, a classic of humor for decades.  Of course, you know what a pin-up is: THAT goes back for centuries (possibly millennia, depending on whether those cave paintings and ancient sculptures were offerings to a fertility goddess orContinue reading “CRUSHES OF YORE”

The King’s Leg Man

     “Sir Comvent!”      “Sire?”      “I need a new pair of boots.”      “I don’t suppose that means I will accompany Your Majesty to the cobbler’s shop.”      “Perhaps you forgot, sir knight, that you speak to a king who pulled his sword from a stone.”      “Perhaps Your Majesty forgets that Your MajestyContinue reading “The King’s Leg Man”