
One of the things which has aroused distaste among some observers and amused jealousy among others is the things dogs can get away with doing right out there in public. Yes, other domesticated animals do the same things, but few people walk through the streets with their cows or ferrets or reindeer.

The most popular of biological necessities among postcard cartoonists was the way dogs mark their territory. One reason for this is that they can leave much of the gag in the mind of the viewer. No need to draw urination in process and risk the censure of postal authorities. All you need to do is show a dog in close proximity to a post or street sign and the reader does the rest.

Experts agree that this is one of the best ways to sell a gag. Your audience enjoys figuring out the punchline. The artist here, of course, has done the wise thing and hedged the bet by giving us a dog in an anxious pose many of us are familiar with.

As has this one. Note that the gag in both cases relies partly on the pole standing in a vast area devoid of trees, which is NOT generally the way this works. (And should there be concerns about this mixture of sacred and profane, there ARE postcards showing dogs watering tombstones and statues of saints. THESE dogs are at least worried about it.)

But even more obvious to the city viewer than the tree gag is the one about the dog and the fire hydrant. This, of course, gave us the time-honored joke (sometimes seen on postcards) about the reporter who rushes into the newsroom to tell a bored editor he has the scoop of the decade. The editor, not easily impressed, yawns, “What? Man bites dog?” “No,” the reporter replies, “But a fire hydrant sprayed one!”

As a retired dog walker, I need to observe that no dog I ever walked was ever all that interested in hydrants. This may simply be because the city where I did my pooch perambulations puts its hydrants on street corners, where the path is often obstructed by high grass, high ground, and/or broken concrete. We kept ourselves to safer ground. (Unless one of us spotted a squirrel.)

The thing is that everyone sees the joke at once. Dog? Fire hydrant? It’s a peeing gag. Smile, chuckle, snort, as suits you, and then move on. Quick and to the point.

Even those who don’t walk dogs know a hydrant is just like the restroom at work, where news is spread and bladder pressure is relieved.

In fact, I wonder if THIS cartoonist has not sabotaged the gag the man is making by including a dog and a hydrant in the scene. Is the puppy here just an unfortunate choice for a bystander beast, as mentioned last week, something to fill space? Or, seeing as how the young lady’s skirt is flying up, are we assumed to have a knowledge of the equally classic “Ladies first” joke? If so, the puppy moves from Bystander Beast to secondary punch…. No, don’t pretend you don’t know that one. I’ve seen what videos you watch on that phone.