“I am impressed, Dr. Van Helsing. You are the last person I would have expected to decorate his house so thoroughly for Halloween trick-or-treaters.”
“At this time of year, the curtain between worlds is at its thinnest. If I can lure the demonic monsters here, I can avoid having them attack innocent partygoers.”
“So this is all bait?”
“Indeed. You may not know it, but all the candy corn available this time of year is actually for people who wish to subdue evil walking scarecrows.”
“I see.”
“Every villain has a confectionary weakness. Evil sentient computers can be appeased with Smarties, while nightmare clowns subside in gratitude for Chuckles or Snickers.”
“I suppose you have Swedish Fish in case the Creature from the Black Lagoon comes by.”
“Not at all. For him I have a Raisin Net. The stray, small spirits of mischief abroad this night will be held back by these Pixy Stix, and I regularly see one wailing ghost who is still looking for Mr. Goodbar. These Starburst will control any alien invaders.”
“And you’ve piled up Mary Janes for the stalking cannibalistic slashers.”
“No: Junior Mince. I have provided for any eventuality, with these emergency candies in case someone I had not anticipated appears. Here’s Bazooka gum, and, at a pinch, Lifesavers.”
“And do you have anything for any actual children who come to the door?”
“Oh, yes. These candy bars.”
“But those are all….”
“Indeed. Twix are for kids.”
Blogsy Babbles 