Old Joke Archaeology

     The problem of dealing with archaic humor is that you often run into jokes which are amusing primarily if you know the context, and know something about the times.  That joke about why Santa Claus won’t bring you a television because he has so much trouble with antennas on the roof isn’t quite theContinue reading “Old Joke Archaeology”

Metal Millinery

     This blog does not really concern itself with current events.  I’m going for material with long-lasting value, not observations on the passing scene.  What’s that?  You feel my observations on butt jokes on vintage postcards is material which will live on for the ages?  Thank you; perhaps it will last at least as longContinue reading “Metal Millinery”

On the Side of Bacon

     I have been known to complain about people paying no attention to this column, but the alternative has its drawbacks.  Someone looked over the last expulsion of words about the difference between pork rinds and cracklin’s, considered the mention of “fatback”, and inquired, “So what about pork belly?  That’s just bacon that hasn’t beenContinue reading “On the Side of Bacon”

Hogging the Snacks

     Pork rinds, which I grew up associating with gas station vending machines and rather ark rundown taverns, now seem to be available at every grocery store and convenience store I go into.  Last week, looking over all the different flavors and wondering once again what the difference is between these and the cracklings myContinue reading “Hogging the Snacks”

Footnotes Afoot

     Dealing with postcards of other days and ways can bring me to the occasional “Huh?” moment.  While this can be entertaining to onlookers, it DOES leave me with the problem of providing footnotes to my wares.  Take this entertaining cartoon, in which our hero, from out of town, asks a policeman, “So, Mr. Watchman,Continue reading “Footnotes Afoot”

Get Busy, Hallmark

     I have a very poor record when it comes to proposing new holidays.  I have sought to increase the market for holiday observances which can help me sell more greeting cards or postcards, but despite my mercenary motivation, my heart is pure.  (The jury is still out on “Pure WHAT?”)      But while lookingContinue reading “Get Busy, Hallmark”

MORE Holiday Needs

     Of course, I reckoned without the ingenuity of Madison Avenue.      Those of you who have read the last column in this space will be aware that I have so far failed utterly to find any conspiracy theories about Theodore Roosevelt.  It isn’t that he is not liable to accusations—no one whose name appearsContinue reading “MORE Holiday Needs”

You’d Scream, Too

     Ice cream should not be complicated.      I am not referring to the making of ice cream, as I might if I wrote a food blog.  I have wrestled with one of those handy dandy ice cream makers in the 1990s, which guaranteed endless delights, and succeeded only in making a flavorful slush.  NorContinue reading “You’d Scream, Too”

SANTA BLOGS XLII

Dear Santa Flops:      Oh you darling fat fraud, there is only one thing I really want from you this Christmas, and that is that you keep far away from my holiday gift list.  How am I supposed to train my relatives to give me useful things, like an online subscription to the Screaming StreamingContinue reading “SANTA BLOGS XLII”