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All Purpose Vehicles

Mere months ago, we considered the postcard possibilities of canoodling in a Cadillac or fooling around in a Ford. We looked at a number of postcards chuckled at by our ancestors which dealt with the uses of an automobile for a little romance on the road, and the perils associated with it. That heroicContinue reading “All Purpose Vehicles”

Ranunculus To You: A to Allspice

A ABATINA “Fickleness” Despite its appearance in eight of the flower language books consulted, abatina is still a mystery to me. The best io can tell you is that once upon a time, the conifers, or trees with cones, were referred to as “abietinae”. But see the next entry. ABECEDARY “Volubility” AlmostContinue reading “Ranunculus To You: A to Allspice”

Vegetation Vocabulary

Now that we have sent two blogs on the introduction and foreword and such, that flower language can settle into the Monday slot previously occupied by the glories of my Old Joke Quizbook. Those of you who have been yearning for postcard pictures can resume their regularly-scheduled program today, while those waiting for moreContinue reading “Vegetation Vocabulary”

Ranunculus To You, Pt. 2

OWNER’S MANUAL AND LIST OF PARTS An average entry in this book consists of two to four parts and looks something like this: BANANA BLOSSOM* “Old Jokes A” B C D Slipping on a banana peel is one of the oldest jokes in the book. It may or may notContinue reading “Ranunculus To You, Pt. 2”

Ranunculus To You, Pt. 1

This is information for which there is NO PRACTICAL USE. None/ None whatsoever. Stop looking for it. From the outset, flower language experts—floriographers—had no illusions. Elizabeth W. Wirt, author of the second flower language book published in the United States, wrote, “The lady who has given her leisure hours to this little playContinue reading “Ranunculus To You, Pt. 1”

Dogs of Doom

I suppose one ought to TRY to be fair, even if one is posting material for the Interwebs. This column, some months ago, did suggest that dogs on postcards are primarily concerned with indiscriminate urination. Although you can find a lot of postcards to demonstrate this (I have plenty more you haven’t seen yet),Continue reading “Dogs of Doom”

Sun ‘n’ Fun

I am, of course, the first philosopher in the history of mankind to observe this but, man, things used to be easier. In grade school, I was taught every year that autumn began on September 22. This was not especially, um, true, as it depends on certain phases of the moon and other usefulContinue reading “Sun ‘n’ Fun”

Old Jokes Go On Forever

And so we come, butternut squash latte, to the klast of our Old Joke Quizzes. I know there are a lot of jokes we did not cover: the book I wrote way back in, well, the twentieth century, did not make space for really old joke poems, or really old dirty jokes, or anyContinue reading “Old Jokes Go On Forever”

Fries With That?

There was a time, avocado sherbet, when people avoided eating “out”. They dined at home or, like my grandmother, packed large lunches when a trip might require being on the road over lunch time. Fast food did not exist, local inspection of dining establishments did not exist, and people tried to avoid any mealContinue reading “Fries With That?”

Return of the Ruff Rider

I may be doing my civic duty, waiting for jury duty, so I am preparing an emergency blog to keep you entertained while I am helping decide the fate of some fellow citizen. (Unless I use my mother’s suggestion and just say, “Sure, I can serve on a jury. Anybody who gets accused oughtaContinue reading “Return of the Ruff Rider”