This blog does not really concern itself with current events. I’m going for material with long-lasting value, not observations on the passing scene. What’s that? You feel my observations on butt jokes on vintage postcards is material which will live on for the ages? Thank you; perhaps it will last at least as long as you spend in detention.
However, a friend of mine, traumatized in her youth by a school which required her to watch a documentary on the making of Reynolds Wrap at least four times, asked me how long wary people have been donning aluminum foil hats. She declines to have any access to the Interwebs at home, for fear of mind control by people who post cat videos, so I do this sort of research on her behalf.
Those of you who are my age or even older (yes, there are such people. Looks like we’ll have TWO corners occupied by members of the class tonight) will realize at once that the question deals with a fairly modern phenomenon. What we are really talking about is the Tin foil hat: tin foil, for the interested, dates from the 1880s or thereabouts, whole aluminum foil came along around 1910.
Sadly, the phrase itself comes along eve later, as the wearing of “metal hats” to block mind control is largely traced to a story written by Julian Huxley and published in 1927..There ARE some sources which trace the phrase back to an English group of the early eighteenth century, referred to as the Mad Hatters, who donned tin foil hats to block mind control long before the rest of the world had this idea. (The problem with this, obviously, is that tin foil didn’t exist yet—unless the Illuminati were covering it up—and the phrase “mad as a hatter” doesn’t seem to have existed until somewhere around 1829. But that story involves mercury, and neither tin nor aluminum really comes into play.)
I was hoping for some reference to that fine old conspiracy theory about the dull side of the foil being poisonous, or a connection with other metals which block rays: the silver backing in mirrors preventing creatures without souls to be reflected, or lead blocking Superman’s vision. But no, all the stories deal specifically with foil hats blocking the sinister mental waves of evil beings. This gets mixed up with a lot of studies of radio waves and tin foil, which in turn brings up wild stories of people who picked up radio broadcasts on the fillings in their teeth. A form of tin foil WAS used in filling teeth, so this is obviously NOT a coincidence. What? There ARE no coincidences in the world of Aluminum Hattie? True enough, but if you kids don’t stop interrupting, I’ll run out of corners.
Reliable studies of the effects of aluminum foil hats are a matter of choice; one which came out of MIT notes that the hats can block some frequencies but AMPLIFIES others. (And wire mesh is better anyhow.) That same study went into which STYLE of foil hat does the job best, which was my first exposure to haute couture in the design of mind control. I was kind of hoping to use a Monty Python Gumby Hat of foil, but this is scorned by all purists. Anyway, in this modern age, I find that most people define a Gumby Hat as a baseball cap with Gumby on it. Culture is crumbling, probably under the effect of all the waves from orbiting satellites…or 5G towers…or those micro chips that…..
Anyway, I hope this at least alerts you to the fact that we are nearing what seems to be the Centennial of the invention of metal anti-mind control hats. And I can get on with my other research. The same person who asked about aluminum foil hats also wondered if the dunce cap and the thinking cap are completely separate phenomena, or are somehow related. (No, as far as I know, no one lines their thinking cap with aluminum. Go over there: now I have to make FOUR dunce caps. Put that roll of foil away; you can see we’re out of corners.)
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